I was browsing through the snaps of one of my close friend’s reception when I came across one which portrayed a saree-clad yours-truly smiling benignly at the couple. I stared critically at the photo. Finally, I concluded that I looked like a slightly overweight single aunt bestowing her ‘blessings’ on the couple.
Sigh…...so what’s new??
Yugjactly nothing….. !!
When I was a kid, I was touted by all my adoring relatives as the next Ms. Mini Universe of the country. Now after ‘growing up’, I realize that kids look cute no matter what mammalian race they belong to; from monkeys to the largest mammal, the whale (errr….not sure about the platypus, though).
Initially, during my adolescent days, I blamed the photographer for all my ‘yuck’ photos, not withstanding 'dabba' camera, shaking frame, poor light, low-quality films. That time was the era of film cameras. So, I got 'shot' for eternity. Unlike now, wherein digital cameras have the easy facility to wipe your existence (only) off the memory card (not a film, mind you) with just a click of the ‘delete’ button, I have had live (and suffer) through innumerable such snaps.
A few (honest but despairing) observations in most photos:
- My head looks too large for the rest of me.
- My face looks like a shiny-shiny coin (read as yuxtremely oily), while in others, it looks as if I had just got up from bed aka sleepy, irritated and tired.
- I have a maniac toothy grin filling most my face (now I wonder why).
- I would have partly closed my eyes (a big thanks to the flash) making me look like as if I had drunk a gallon of …. err… beer(??).
- Some dirty bugger would have pressed the ‘capture’ button even before I had begun to pose. I look so lost, aimless and hunched (like a beggar) that I am wondering whether that’s how I look in real life.
- Close-ups have managed to make my already-enlarged nose seem like a … like a….. doNN-meNasinakaayi (capsicum). Oh…. for a nose like Cleopatra’s…………sigh. And how can I forget squint eyes!!
- My hair seems all over my face that it’s a wonder (of wonders) that people are able to recognize me. Conversely, I would have pulled it so tight that I would have looked 10 years older.
- And ya….the most common of all – some of my friends have decided to make me a cow – horns and all – while I have grinned stupidly into the camera with all the unawareness of an innocent (maybe this is why I believe in revenge).
Add a few permutations and combinations of all above and viola, I have something that can barely be digested! Par kya kare...control nahi hota :(.
From indignation to acceptance, I have covered a long journey indeed.
So, when one of my friends mailed me that she I looked ‘gorgeous’ in one of the photos, I immediately thanked her for her sarcasm .When actually, she was being quite honest.
Sigh…so…. what’s new??