D and I share what I call the ‘ideal’ friendship –without any demands on either side. To D’s credit, she’s one of those rare people with whom I can just be myself – sometimes witty, sometimes sarcastic and most of the times quiet (a repeated cliché?). I digress to say that when silence is comfortable between people, rest assured that they can be good friends. I still have to ask her what she sees in me – you see, I can be very tiring at times...... :-)......
It was she who had popped this question in one of her (delightful) mails – “Does maturity come with experience?” I was inclined to reply in positive when I checked myself – “Is experience the only key to maturity?” Is it really necessary to experience things before taking a plunge? If that’s the case what about those who continue to bungle in spite of being involved in ‘bad’ (it’s a relative term) experiences? Does that mean they haven’t learnt from their experiences?
When one has reached a certain age of maturity, one develops the sense to observe and learn from his/her surroundings – both good and bad. It could include not only one’s personal experiences but also of the people termed as ‘close’. And the degree of learning is totally dependent on how much one’s affected by them sans a complacent nature. It could be anyone – a child deeply affected by divorce could decide never to marry; a politician affected by the country’s plight could actually bring about a positive change; a person affected adversely by poverty may vow not to put his children through the same.......
Life is one big bag of tricks. And if there’s one thing man doesn’t know it is to predict the future. True, one can resort to reading the stars, the planets, the palms, the lines on one’s forehead, crystal balls and astrologers to decoding the number of warts on one’s nose. And pay through the nose for the same. One of the ways to ensure a ‘safe’ future is to take it as it comes...and learn from it.
As SBA says – “Something that should not have happened has happened......and you have no choice but to live with it.” It’s how you live with it that makes all the difference.........
8 comments:
yeah..what sba says is quite true..
chitra travels...sounds good ;-)
Hi,
People learn from their failures , but the wiser ones from other's failures.
Not all are born wise, and there is something like fate that intervenes us . I wrote about it in my blog.
-/Sujit
Yuppu :-) !!
-/Endevourme
Grrrrr...have to delete those...!
-/Chitra
Hey....I think I read it...liked it!
-/Praise
Thanks!
I think even experience is of no use when u don't confide on it.
After how many experience do u think u will become wise and mature and how much mature you become?
Who will you then compare ur wisdom/maturity with?
Till you get tired or you are mentally phased out believing to have reached ecstasy!
That tiring is again Relative -Oops -there is always scope for thought ghastly as Einstien's brain.
A simple question- (though it is said SIMPLICITY is complex to achieve:-) )
How have you matured by relying on experience?
Learning and experience should be accompanied with
Faith and confidence.
A life with experiences(passive) without response(active) makes it invalid and void learning because its LIFE -a thing to live up not hold.Even a response in itself a learning.So grab every oppurtunity and confide on life.Proclaim your virtues and loopholes.Live the life.
Face the life and Enrich the life.And remember after every night there is a day.
I prefer to RESPOND positively than to negatively REACT in LIFE.
I would be lucky if i can know "response" from your ideal friend D about my views.
-/Anon
First things first - after such a nice comment, why do you prefer anonymity?
Second - yup...one cannot rely on experiece alone. That's one true statement. But then, how many of us can get our arm severed and laugh about it later as a learning experience? As we learn something, we lose something as well....sometimes the scales are equal...and sometimes, we lose more than just learn from it.
And ya, will confer with D about it :-)!
I think you didn't get me.
Experience is passive.Living in this world you will be subject to it everyday.
What is your response to it?
By your post I see you lose to learn something.That's your response or shall I call it reaction to experience.
(A lot of clumsy movies,habits or company may be a factor for low confidence:-) )
I can't stop myself from stating one Murphy's law here.
The difference between Murphy's laws and nature's laws is that in the latter things get screwed up in the same way repeatedly.
Are you sure you have lost?
I think learning and losing are mutually exclusive.You can't lose as well as learn.
When you learn you always gain else you haven't learnt.Remember your college days.How many times you lost when you learnt something properly.Now don't tell me that your best friend scored 1 mark more than what u scored.(I don't like the first bench monitor girls-still they are fun to deal with:-)) )
When you learn and get your arms severed why do u have to artificially laugh.Feel the pain and cry.Even you have to respond to your pains!
You say Appearances are deceptive.I say perceptions are even more deceptive.
The problem is while the former is visible the latter although your own, is not.
Be light and humble like our Rahul Dravid.He is light weight and never says we have lost.He says we played badly.We will learn and perform in next game.(At times I find him disgusting though because of his stamina.Even people need to eat and DIGEST more.Yup."Loss" of energy caters the "lost cause").Here comes my favourite topic.People don't have the capability to digest things.After all there is nothing in this world than DIGESTION.
So dig as much as you can. Truth is not superficial-its deep.Probably because its heavy.Maybe what you percieve to have lost may be still waiting for you.Are you listening C and D.
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