Wednesday, August 28, 2019

Son of mine....

Sometimes, the hardest effort is not enough. 
Sometimes, the deepest emotion is not enough.
Sometimes, the oldest relationship is not enough. 
Sometimes, the fiercest love is not enough.
Having a child is hard enough. Having to compete for his affections is even harder. 
Especially when you are the “bad” parent. 
The strict parent.
The parent with rules.
The parent with schedule.
The parent who does the grunge work like cooking meals, washing clothes for the kid but hardly gets time to read stories because she is so tired.
The parent who is more intellectual than fun. 
The parent who is more like a caretaker than a Mother. 
The parent who’s constantly shamed into thinking that she’s not good enough of an example.
The parent who simply doesn’t know how to love in order to be loved back.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Down the memory lane......

One of the travails and tribulations of growing up as homo sapiens is keeping track of the innumerable email ids. I have progressed to different email providers over the years and as a result, keeping track of my older emails is a herculean task. There have been instances where I've forgotten that I had an email on a particular account and I open my email to belatedly realize a ton of messages from friends. From the lack of my replies, I am sure that they must be of the impression that 1. I am too busy to reply (which is not the case since I can spare time for all my good friends), 2. I no longer consider them my friends (I have few friends I consider close and not keeping in touch with them is not an option :-)..)

Today was one such occasion when I had a lot of time on my hands (read.... I was prevaricating). I opened my one of my less frequently checked email-accounts and found a ton of junk mail. Nothing new. As I dug further, I came across a few exchanges among a couple of my friends. Precious gold nuggets. As I opened and read each of them, a sense of wonder filled me and a smile tugged at the corners of my mouth. Some serious, some humorous, some lamenting, some cheerful, some even cribbing, but every single email had a strong current of humor and genuineness running through it (wow.... I must have been an electrical engineer hoda janma to think of such a beautiful analogy :P).  Was this gregarious individual truly me? 

As to the people who mailed me, these included close friends from work, from childhood, from blog and even from my bus! These were people who stood witness to my most happiest and depressing moments, and spared some time to reach out to me....to let me know that I was not alone. Now I have their emails - some inspiring words, some memorable photos - as fond memories as the time I was relatively younger, relatively happier and relatively care-free. 

Now, I have all the tools of modern times to help me keep in touch with my friends. A FB account. A smartphone. Skype/Google+ chat. The only difference is that the familiar friends are missing, having been caught up with life, work and family (not necessarily in that order). Do I miss them? Hell yeah! But, there's someone I miss more - moi

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Eega - The end of imaginative cinema...or not!

Being married is not a bed of roses. Being married to a movie fanatic is definitely NOT a bed of roses. Day in and day out (hey....let's not forget the nights and weekends), one is reminded that televisions exist to push men into a state of oblivion. And woe betide that woman who defies this 'pull of attraction'...towards the television, of course! She is left to stew in her own imagination (read boredom) and is barred from entering some of the innermost portals of her man's mind. So it comes as no surprise that after years of 'silent suffering' (hah!), I decided to 'convert'. A and I would at least have a common topic to talk/discuss/fight about :-)! And thus came the plan to see the movie Eega. FYI, Eega means fly in Telugu. 


For all those arty cinema lovers who like subtle romance or hidden meanings, Eega promises you...absolutely  nothing. However, for those of us who like action combined with comedy combined with all the makings of a masala movie (oh.... let's not forget the idea of good winning over evil), Eega proves to be a delightful and entertaining movie. The screenplay is pretty tight with very few loose gaps. And yes, the animation is something to write about. One might wonder that there's absolute lack of facial emotions for a fly when there's nothing human to start with, just a tiny face full of millions of eyes? But nope. All through the three hours of the movie, I was enthralled (along with the rest of the crowd and that included kids) by all those little gestures that conveyed, oh so cutely (yes, I repeat cutely) just the right kind of emotion. 


With every fly...er...hero, there has to be a villain (something like for every action there's an equal and opposite reaction?) In comes namma Sudeep as namma villain! And what a villain (and a human one at that)!  He is equally convincing as the both sadistic lover intent on bedding the heroine and the loony madman who's convinced that he's being stalked by no less a fly. But then again, I've always loved admired his acting prowess even if it's a bit too intense. 


In all, I wasn't sure whether the idea for this movie evolved because of a complete lack of imaginative idea,s or whether because there were loads in an area not yet explored. Or maybe it's an old wine in a new bottle - a new idea which had hitherto been stale ( or even downright stupid) now presented using the latest technology. Whatever the reason, Suresh Babu (the film's producer) is laughing all the way to the bank. 

And did I mention spoiler alert? There... I did! 

Monday, October 03, 2011

And thus, I complain!

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

So....I lost my smartphone. Bummer!

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

*grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble *grumble * grumble * grumble *

Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Made for each other, but how?

Anyone who's born a lady would surely agree with me - we need someone to crib to! After a hard day's work, we need a space to de-stress, to relax, and most of the times, this is the form of a verbal barrage of words to someone. A friend, sibling, Mom, last but not the least the spouse!


Imagine this scene: After a hard day's work, you go back home. No sooner than you unlock the door and cross the threshold, you see your husband sitting in front of the TV, engrossed in a cricket match (inspired by the ICC tournament :P). The sight of your better-half galvanizes you into talking, and mind you, it is not about how happy you are to see him. It is all about your work - bad boss, uncooperative colleagues, hostile work environment, the long hours spent in travel, the general tiredness, so on so forth. Office politics (I can see most of my friends who are working vigorously nodding their heads!). The twist in the story is thus: do you expect hubby dear to switch off the TV and listen to your rant? Or does he continue to watch the TV while you render a laudable imitation of a (much played) record?


The answer is (the background music rising to a crescendo) - there's no right answer! (No no...the crescendo is not deflating!). It depends....it depends on the relationship and the individuals involved.


I am no expert in the matter of relationships. However, I have had my fair share of friends to whom I have been an excellent agony aunt (or so I believe!). And yes, I get to listen to a lot of complaints. However, I have had my fair share of confides that have been extremely positive. And listening to the latter makes me think - so such men really exist? How much patience would that man have to listen to a whining wife all the time? Doesn't he have any frustrations of his own? Doesn't he feel that he is on the receiving end of a negative tirade all the time?


Maybe the secret is this - the relationship would have reached a level where the man feels that the positives of wifey outweigh the negatives (and that includes cribbing), and he is ready to believe in her and help her in any way he can. And if that involves being a sounding board, so be it!


You may have heard of the "Made for each other" sentiment. But couples are not random jigzaw puzzles to perfectly fit each other in style and temperament. Although rare, I have seen a few exemplary couples in real life - their love and respect for each other is so apparent that it makes me wonder - how much time did they take to reach this level of understanding on their journey together...how much time did they take to "fit" together? Is it a function of time at all? Or is it personalities? Or is it compromise?


Questions, questions, questions! I hope that time can answer them ;-)!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

When in doldrum....

.......have something nice.....

................like this :P!



Sunday, December 26, 2010

The key to change

There was once a time where I was posting left right and center on this blog. And having 50+ comments (here's the proof). Lately, it has dwindled to one, perhaps two posts every three months! Not good...not good at all...so tells the husband.


PA, as I refer to him in my blog, reads all my blog-posts including those on my photo-blog. This is surprising since he, being the typical male, dislikes (note: hate is too strong a word) all emotional, sentimental, ...er...all *tal things (you get the idea, right?) and my blog has tons of sentiment flowing out of it. Still, for a person who does not like books, it was surprising to listen to him saying "C, you have given up writing blogs? Why? You write so well. I was reading your blog and all I could think was what happened to this person who wrote so beautifully?" Well PA, I did not run out of topics. Some other priorities overtook this past-time. Plus, as in my previous post, I do not have an overwhelming urge, as I had before, to spew out my thoughts. I have changed (surprise of surprises!). For the better (I hope). And I quite like it!


So we come back to where I started - the blog. It's my baby, something I found solace in when I was mad at the rest of the world (well, still am but no so much :-)..). Sine the key to change (especially those pleasant ones) is to accept and move on, I suppose I should devote some time to blogging as well. Things that are in the process of changing my mind - PA, 24 comments awaiting my moderation when I logged in yesterday, friends urging me to blog again. As a result, notice the brand new template....and the post? Still more in the works.


Lately, I have been toying with the idea of making this blog password-protected. What are your thoughts? (Spew) out with it.......